不知道這樣是不是比較能夠委婉的趕走鄰居 - Switch
By Poppy
at 2020-03-25T00:03
at 2020-03-25T00:03
Table of Contents
自己寫的 手動從巴哈搬運過來XD
原文網址:
https://m.gamer.com.tw/forum/Co.php?bsn=7287&snB=16155
那邊分隔我自己比較滿意(x
一開始沒想到要刷首抽
結果是一隻黑豬妹跟食蟻獸
食蟻獸還蠻可愛的,也不煩人所以跟他相安無事
可是就是那個黑豬妹
怎麼說呢,好像有點太三八了,實在是喜歡不太起來
聽說能想辦法趕走他,可是又不想對她直接攻擊
畢竟本島主秉持著:
「正直良善而且注重動物權的精神」
怎麼能覺得人家不好看就把人趕走呢!!
那不然轉換個方法,讓她自己覺得不舒服想離開好了。
https://i.imgur.com/l6WOL4S.jpg
於是我進了她家,跟她表面上交好
確定她會乖乖待在家
https://i.imgur.com/dzybwwp.jpg
「這隻黑豬好像發燒了,不如就……」
https://i.imgur.com/6LE3BWK.jpg
先居家隔離起來
結果隔一段時間發現她自己把坑填了,這強制隔離的手段似乎沒什麼作用
於是我想到了一個很台灣的方法
直接在她家門口辦喪事
https://i.imgur.com/UQXVJQb.jpg
不過總覺得好像太祥和,少了一點戾氣
就怕她沒感覺
所以再稍微加強一點細節
地上可能要撒點什麼
https://i.imgur.com/SLCefAu.jpg
撒紙錢!!!
我 好 恨 啊
經過了一夜,我看她好像一整天沒出過門
我以為她嚇的躲在家裡瑟瑟發抖了
早上看她站在家門口似乎有點不知所措
看來我的戰術奏效了
https://i.imgur.com/m1UP1ea.jpg
集合啦!動物治喪委員會!
我想說她可能過一陣子就會跑過來對著我大喊
「我不當島民啦!!JOJO!!」
本島主的名稱叫袋鼠JOJO
但是事與願違 ,並沒有發生
就想說放著讓她跟自己的痛苦對話吧
反正眼不見為淨
結果
下一秒發現她在河邊釣魚
https://i.imgur.com/XWQdm7J.jpg
我看了嚇一跳
這隻豬居然有如此強大的精神力,好像都沒事發生一樣
這不是在逼我動手嗎!
於是我聽從其他島主的建議
試著在她不注意的情況下偷偷請他離開
於是我悄悄跟著她
https://i.imgur.com/n5aLq6W.jpg
哎呀?怎麼有根空氣木頭呢?
先砍掉吧!
https://i.imgur.com/a8smtyy.jpg
哎呀 揮了個空
正當我要砍第二下的時候….......
https://i.imgur.com/VQkffeS.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/rateUrb.jpg
………………
………這下靠腰了。
完了,我連房子的貸款都還沒還完,我可能就得先去吃免錢飯了
這幾天我在這座島玩的很開心
想不到這自由的空氣只呼吸了幾天
再見了,方吉妙妙島!
再見了,自由的生活!
我來啦!動物牢友會!
https://i.imgur.com/wtO99Pl.jpg
嗯?
她說我長的很可愛,所以就當作沒事了??
聽到了沒有!諸君!
可愛就是正義啊!!
https://i.imgur.com/525k1QJ.jpg
於是我悄咪咪的,準備我們
https://i.imgur.com/eA4jrCJ.jpg
今晚的佳餚
https://i.imgur.com/EYQfEX5.jpg
大 吉 大 利
今 晚 吃 豬
她真的很適合這個擺設呢!
本故事純屬虛構,沒有任何一隻豬受到傷害
除了心裡上的
嗯,很遺憾的是她還是活跳跳的,我都已經動手了還馬上就氣消了,害我有點於心不忍
過兩天其他鎮民來了再來看看吧
附上我們的擺設
讓大家也能在人家門口治喪
https://i.imgur.com/lGZbxl6.jpg
石頭地板
https://i.imgur.com/vS8oSaM.jpg
還有很會歌頌醫院的孩子圖案
https://i.imgur.com/kgFMBBc.jpg
讓大家的孤島生活有個伴
繼前兩次的努力之後,我都已經把第一批貸款都還清了
很遺憾的是,不管我怎麼威脅利誘都動搖不了她,好像反而越挫越勇
而且
神出鬼沒
https://i.imgur.com/Klo2uvd.jpg
他似乎永遠都會跟我偶遇,我不由得嚇出一坨青屎
https://i.imgur.com/RkI4330.jpg
於是我就轉念一想
想到孟母三遷的故事
其舍近墓。孟子之少時,嬉遊為墓間之事,踴躍築埋。孟母曰:「此非吾所以居處子。」乃去
孟子因為家住在墓地旁邊,開始玩辦喪事的遊戲,孟母覺得不好決定要搬走。
對啊,我怎麼就沒想到呢!
把規模擴大就好啦!
在中間擺七天
直接推到旁邊燒
然後灰往花園一埋
https://i.imgur.com/XSPKTab.jpg
哇靠
殯葬產業鍊啊!!
我真是天才
可是我們豬大姐一樣似乎不為所動
反而因為家門口多了好多東西而顯的更開心了
現在想想,我之前可能都努力錯方向了
剛好今天有新的鄰居搬過來了
他是我在澳洲的酒肉朋友,阿栗
https://i.imgur.com/eWXPvpv.jpg
「嗨。」
我跟阿栗講了我現在這邊的狀況
請他幫我出個主意
於是他跟我說了一個方法……
聽了阿栗的方法之後
我開始跟豬小妹打好關係
https://i.imgur.com/Qnhdb0S.jpg
「那個…我其實有一個導演夢。」
「我希望你能來當我的女主角!」
「……!!」
豬小妹不可置信,一口答應了我的要求
於是我們一行人搭著飛機來到了攝影棚
https://i.imgur.com/xhT1NcI.jpg
「演員都就位了嗎?」
「那個…導演....請問這樣可以嗎?」
https://i.imgur.com/mIATHso.jpg
「太棒了!很可愛喔!我的眼光果然沒錯!」
「好的導演!我一定會努力的!」
「那準備開始囉!」
https://i.imgur.com/x83l7xF.jpg
「好,開機!」
「第一場一鏡一次!」
「集合啦!動物黑獸會!」
https://i.imgur.com/r5WMk4D.jpg
Camera!!
本作品沒有任何豬隻受到傷害
分隔線
她好像真的沒有要搬走的意思
而且還一直送我東西,她是不是發現我的意圖在討好我R
急,在線等
--
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at 2021-06-26T23:14
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